More Twitter Larfs: tHERsday

Here’s another little comedy rant I went on over at the twitter last Thursday. Laugh, you monkeys! LAUGH!!!

  • Like @NYDailyNews, I’m declaring today tHERsday. All my tweets will be patronizingly geared toward women.
  • NO MORE ROAD RASH! How To Get Your Man To Shave Before Cunnilingus – More inside!
  • A 3-WAY WITH AUNT FLO: How To Spice Up Your Sex Life During Menstruation
  • OUT OF YOUR DEPTH: How A Life Of Shallow Materialism Can Lead To Lasting Happiness
  • WHY WE STILL LOVE OPRAH: No, Really. Why DO We Listen To Everything That Overbearing, Self-Centered, Patronizing Cow Says?
  • YOU’RE NOT THAT UGLY: Untouched, Unflattering Celebrity Photos To Make You Feel Better About Yourself!
  • YOU’RE FAT & YOU’RE OUTFIT’S OUT OF STYLE: How We Keep Our Pockets Lined By Keeping You Insecure
  • LIQUOR IS QUICKER: Forget The Workouts & Makeovers, Gals! Just Bring A Fifth Of Gin. A Drunk Guy Will Fuck ANYTHING. Seriously.
  • And, so ends this week’s tHERsday, ladies. Please buy my cheaply made, poorly thought-out, overpriced cosmetics & apparel.

Ooooooohhhhh…. SCATHING!

 

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